I don't know why I'm in the "customer service" field.

I do NOT have patience for stupidity! Zero. Zilch. Nada.

If I could, I would reach throught he phone and put you out of your own misery.

For example (relating to calls about web account access):

1.) "I don't know if I registered for account access or not."
-Really? Why don't you try logging before wasting my time! Or write it down next time.
2.) "Does the Caps Lock key count as a capital letter in my password?"
- Really? Seriously, you've GOT to be kidding me. Was that a real question? Am I being "Punked"?
3.) "Does a number count as a letter in my password?"
- This came from the same person. Clearly a super-idiot!
4.) "Do I put the temporary password in the 'reset password question' box?"
- Of course not moron, it's a temporary password. You put it in the "password" box, under your user ID so that you can log in.
5.) "It says my account number is wrong."
- See how your account statement says "FUND/ACCOUNT NUMBER" 123/123456789? That would mean the fund number is to the left of the slash and the account number is to the right. Does the entry box ask for your fund and account number? Nope. Don't think it does. Which would mean you only put your account number there. What an novel idea!
6.) Me: "Your temporary password that I will be reading off to you will have one uppercase letter, one number, and the rest of the letters will be lower case. Capital 'L' as in Lima, 'a' as in Apple.

Stupid caller: "Is that a big 'A'?"

Me: "No, the only capital letter is the first letter."

Stupid caller: "Oh, okay."

Me: "Capital 'L' as in Lima, 'a' as in alpha, 't' as in tango, 'o' as in oscar, the number five, 's' as in sam."

Stupid caller: "So it's capital L, a, t, zero, five, s."

Me: "No, it's not a zero, it's the letter O."

Stupid caller: "So it's capital L, a, t, zero, five, s."

Me: "No, no. It's the letter 'O' as in Oscar, not zero."

Stupid caller: "Oh okay, thanks."